


mama, i'm in love with a criminal

by astoriaamalfoyy



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Muggle, F/M, Graffiti, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Not Canon Compliant, but like it's not that bad, criminal activity, james potter is a cutie, lily evans hates the police, literally just jily
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2020-08-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:53:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25722382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astoriaamalfoyy/pseuds/astoriaamalfoyy
Summary: “You know this is highly illegal right?” “Of course, I know it’s illegal… but, honestly, who gives a shit?”***in which james and lily deface school property.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter
Comments: 7
Kudos: 30





	mama, i'm in love with a criminal

**Author's Note:**

> i know the title is brittany spears but it literally has nothing to do with her song. i just thought it was funny based on the fic's theme.

“Lily.”

“What?”

“You know this is highly illegal right?”

“Of course, I know it’s highly illegal, but who gives a shit? Not me.”

“We both know that isn’t true, you give more shits than any one to ever exist in this godforsaken town. And you know it!” exclaimed James, setting the huge duffel bag of spray paint onto the grass. “I thought you were supposed to be the sensible one out of the pair of us.”

“I am sensible,” she replied, digging into the duffel and pulling out a can of pink spray paint. “This is the Webster dictionary’s definition of sensible, did you know?” she shook it in her hands before throwing it at the boy, who was looking at her with wide eyes.

He caught the can and toyed with it in his hands nervously. “I don’t know about this, Lils.”

“Oh, come on, you and the boys play pranks all the time.”

“Yes, but our pranks are normal jokes that every single stereotypical schoolboy has done during their high school career. Nothing that we have ever done is illegal, even in the slightest. But defacing school property with spray paint after having Remus hijack the cameras? That, my lovely girlfriend, is very, very illegal. We could go to jail for this, and I know how much you hate the police.”

“The police can fuck themselves.”

“Lily…”

“Look, if you don’t want to do this, then go home. I can do this with or without you.”

“I literally drove you here,” James mumbled, tossing the spray can to the ground to grab her hand. “You’ve never done anything like this before.”

“What, graffiti?”

“No… well, yes, but I mean rule breaking,” he said.

She groaned, pulling away from him.

James continued, “in all the years I’ve known you, you haven’t broken a single rule. Absolutely no detentions and I don’t think I’ve ever seen you receive a tardy slip despite being late to Sluggy’s class all the time.”

“That’s the point,” Lily snapped, motioning to the scene around her, “to all this!”

Once he didn’t reply, she added, “my whole life, I’ve played by the rules. I’ve never dared to break them, I didn’t think it was possible… but you and the boys play your pranks and the girls go partying every weekend and I’m here, goody two-shoes Lily Evans, just along for the ride and staying inside every weekend to study my ass off. But high school is over and we leave for college in three months. And I am  _ so done _ . I want to live my life to the fullest, James, and so far I haven’t been.”

He reached for her hand and noticed that instead of the usual wonder and excitement present in her green eyes, there were tears threatening to spill. “You are so much more than a goody two-shoes,” he told her, “I know it, the others know it, everyone knows it. You say you’ve just been along for the ride and have never truly lived… but are you including the time we went bungee jumping over spring break and went on that road trip last summer and crammed for Minnie’s APUSH exam and attended your family reunion and borrowed Sirius’ motorcycle? It seems to me that you’re forgetting those experiences where you lived,  _ we lived _ , Lily. Together. You and I.

“Just because you don’t prank Snivellus and his posse of dumbasses and don’t go clubbing with the girls doesn’t mean you aren’t living,” he finished, letting go of one of her hands to it over her chest to feel her fluttering heartbeat. “This in here means you’re living. The way our hearts beat for one another means we’re living.”

“Why are you so poetic?” she demanded, tears finally falling from her eyes as she wrapped him in a hug. “I love you,” Lily whispered, voice faltering from her cries.

James pulled away carefully after a few minutes. “I love you more,” he said and picked up the pink spray can off the grass. “Now, do you still want to do this?”

“But you said it was highly illegal and we could go to jail.”

“That wasn’t my question.”

She wiped her cheeks dry and reached into the duffel bag, smiling. Lily shook a can of green spray paint in her hands before popping the lid off. “Let’s do this.”

“Alright,” James said, unscrewing the lid off his own. “What should I write?”

“Anything you want,” Lily replied and started; a lopsided smiley face. 

James sprayed his own message onto the brick wall;  _ JP + LE 4EVER _ .

“Cute,” she said, finishing her second smiley face, “but if the police see that, they’ll know it’s us and track us down. Probably take away your soccer scholarship too and then your mom won’t let us talk anymore.”

He shrugged. “First off, fuck the police. Secondly, my mother loves you more than me so I doubt she’d do that.”

“Hm,” Lily mused after a few moments in a thoughtful daze, wrapping an arm around James’ waist. “I think I’m done being a criminal for the night. Wanna go to IHOP?”

“Yes,” he exasperated, planting a soft kiss on the top of her head, “I thought you’d never ask.”

“Come on, let’s go get pancakes… or well, French toast in your case. Because you’re weird like that.”

“No way, French toast is elite.”

“Sure,” Lily rolled her eyes, leaning up to kiss him.

**Author's Note:**

> definitely not based on a true story... no it really isn't but it'd be lit if it was.
> 
> if you want, kudos and comments are greatly appreciated and truly make my day. if not, i hope you have a great day and enjoyed the fic!
> 
> check me out on [tumblr!](https:/emptysatellite/.tumblr.com/)


End file.
